New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Randomize
