how can u be prego again
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize