Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
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