that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
