Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Green mimosas i think yes
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
