I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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