so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize