So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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