You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
