Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
