she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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