There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Randomize
