I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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