I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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