Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I wish i was in the wii world.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
