Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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