I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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