I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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