Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
My vagina is very pro this idea
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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