I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
