It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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