I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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