so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize