Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
there was a trapeze. enough said
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
