Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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