My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
