I feel great
I just peed on a car
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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