Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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