I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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