PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
