Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize
