You really coming over, don't trick.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
