Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
