I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
