So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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