whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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