Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
