If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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