My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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