ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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