I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
