Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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