I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
