physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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