she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He felt like a one man threesome
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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