If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Randomize
