I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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