it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Randomize
