alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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