I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
You need a sexual gate keeper
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
